Taking Over Me
by aykayem
Summary: Heero reminisces to himself. Light slash. Oneshot, song fic.


Title: Taking Over Me

Series: Gundam Wing/AC

Genre: Angst/Romance

Summary: Heero reminisces to himself. Light slash. One-shot, song fic.

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing/AC copyright to Sunrise; "Taking Over Me" copyright to Evanescence.

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_You don't remember me_

_But I remember you_

I stood there, just watching him lie there, knowing nothing about us. His mind was completely blank of anything about us. In some ways, he was lucky, and I envied him. He could start over, a new life from scratch. Me, I had to live with these bloodstains forever, always remembering the days when all I had was war, and battles. The Perfect Soldier will never die in me, no matter how much I slaughtered it inside me. These bloodstains will never leave, not for me, or the others. Except him.

_I lie awake and try so hard_

_Not to think of you_

Leaving us all like that, was betrayal of the worst form. We could have told him everything, filled the blanks of his mind. But they wouldn't let us. He left us, for a better life, under a new name, so we'll never find him again. He betrayed us. But I love him.

_But who can decide what they dream?_

_And dream I do..._

Every night he haunts my memory, my dreams consist of him, and him alone. My every thought is of him, the young man who left. The warmth he brought to us when he came in the room, and his constant cheerfulness. Why I dream of him now, and never before is beyond me. I've never understood these feelings of the heart, and never will.

_I believe in you_

_I'll give up everything just to find you_

_I have to be with you to live to breathe_

_You're taking over me_

I've looked everywhere for him, him and his telltale joyousness, in even the toughest of times. I've been searching for years now, never finding a single trace, but just when I feel like I'll search forever, I feel his presence. It haunts me in every way, never leaving me alone. I believe one day I'll find him. I won't go on until I do.

_Have you forgotten all I know_

_And all we had?_

I used to think that we were best friends, we'd always be there for each other, even when he got himself captured, and I had to rescue him time and time again. Those times became bonding times for us, seeing as he got captured so often. Why I fell in love with him, I don't know. Probably because of his cluelessness, if that's a word. Me and him, we were nearly inseparable. If one of was hurt, the other would be right there, tending to the injury. If one of us had a problem, the other would be right there, talking it out. Then, in a second, all that was gone. He doesn't even know my name, for fear that it would bring back the painful memories of the past.

_You saw me mourning my love for you_

_And touched my hand_

_I knew you loved me then_

When I sat there, hiding my emotions that fateful day, thousands of thoughts ran through my mind. My injuries weren't bad, but when he saw me just sitting there, he seemed to hate himself for letting me get hurt. But truly, it wasn't my injuries that made me look that emotionless, it was the love I hid from everyone , the love that nearly consumed me. I yearned to tell him, until he saw past my barrier, touching my hand with a soft smile, it was then that we saw through each other, to the love we had for the other. I never thought he'd love me the same way I did.

_I believe in you_

_I'll give up everything just to find you_

_I have to be with you to live to breathe_

_You're taking over me_

And then, at the very moment we realised it, he was gone. Mind and memory completely destroyed, not a trace of remembering us, after the blow that had taken effect right then. I should've guessed what would happen, when I saw the cut across his forehead, and his slowly dissipating memories of me. I never got to tell him how much I loved him, but he would've just brushed it off with a single wave of his hand. Oh, how I now long for him, his warm presence to a room, and the cheeriness he gave to everything.

_I look in the mirror and see your face_

_If I look deep enough_

_So many things inside that are_

_Just like you are taking over_

Though he abandoned us years ago, or so it seems, I've never been able to forget him, like the others. They dropped the subject of finding him long ago, while I pressed the search on, alone. He's taken me over, like I'm a container for his lost soul, leading me to him. He's living inside me, the missing piece of the puzzle, the one no one ever finds, because it was lost in an area of the world, where no one's looked in ages, and never will look. I hate this...I hate this world, and I hate the people who I thought were my friends...and I hate him. Most of all, him. For leaving me alone in this world, for stealing my heart unexpectedly, for everything. And I love him.


End file.
